59. Managing friendships in old age—wise advice from Pinky Agnew (Encore)
Pinky Agnew, a much-loved New Zealand comedian, entertainer, and funeral celebrant, talks with Rachel McAlpine (me) about managing friendships in old age. Midlife is a good time to consider your friendships and what lies ahead. Is fear of loneliness a factor in your private FOGO (Fear Of Getting Old)?
“Managing friendships” is not just about avoiding loneliness, a known killer of old people — it includes backing away from friends who are no longer right for you, being friendly to strangers, maintaining good friendships when circumstances change, accepting the loss of some friends, and being open to unexpected friendships.
Pinky has good tips on making new friends, dissolving friendships, how not to be a grumpy old bugger, and how to have 7 conversations a day. (She says that talking to a dog counts as a conversation, even if the dog does not talk back.)
I finish with a poem: “How to make friends when you’re old.”
Plenty to learn here about managing friendships, including from our best teachers: little children.
NOTE: Encore! A longer version of this episode was first broadcast 18 months ago. The challenge of making and keeping friends continues throughout life, so it’s well worth a second listen!
- How to make friends as a middle aged man, even if the idea makes you feel weird Ross McCammon Time Magazine. 2018
- Annoying your friends An instant poem by me that I still find funny
- Cultivate women friends: a tiny tip for a happy healthy old age Simple as. Reposted from Margo’s blog, date unknown